Untangle vs Lasting: a couples course or a mediator?

What is Lasting, and who is it for?

Lasting is a couples app from Talkspace. You work through short sessions and courses on communication, conflict and trust, together, whenever suits you. One Premium subscription unlocks it for two users.

It’s a good fit for couples who aren’t in the middle of anything and want to learn the skills before they need them, and for therapists who like to give couples homework. It has a large, well-rated following on the App Store (see the table).

What does Untangle do differently?

Untangle isn’t a course. It’s for the moment the fight is actually happening, or the fight you’ve had before. Underneath every one, one of you doesn’t feel heard.

First it’s just you and Tara, about 10 minutes, to find what the fight is really about. She helps you turn what you feel into words your partner can actually hear. Then your partner joins free from a link, and Tara takes turns, keeps it fair and checks you each were heard. When it runs hot, she slows the room and gets three yeses before anyone tries to fix anything.

Untangle is built on the WinWin Conversations framework by Kamal Sarma, with Nonviolent Communication underneath. The membership also includes The Repair (6 evenings) and 10 guided exercises, for the calmer nights.

• Asks one question at a time
• Gives you each a turn, fairly
• Tells you the kind, true thing, privately, and only you see it
• Never shows your partner what you wrote until you share it

Which one costs more?

Lasting lists several Premium and Plus plans on the US App Store, from $11.99 to $89.99, and Choosing Therapy reports $29.99 a month, $59.99 for 3 months and $89.99 for 6 months. Its free trial is 7 days on monthly and yearly plans.

Untangle is one plan: $25 a month for both of you, after 3 days free, and your partner’s seat is always included. Month to month, Lasting’s reported $29.99 costs more. Over 6 months, its reported $89.99 works out at about $15 a month, cheaper than Untangle.

Can you use Lasting and Untangle together?

Yes. They do different jobs. Lasting teaches you skills on a quiet evening. Untangle helps you use them when the fight starts, with Tara between you keeping it fair.

One honest difference: Lasting publishes its own survey results. We have no study of Untangle yet, so don’t take our word for it.

What neither one is for

Neither app gives you a licensed therapist of your own. Untangle is not therapy and not for emergencies, and it isn’t designed for abuse, coercive control or fear for your safety. If that’s where you are, talk to a professional. If a conversation turns into a crisis, Tara pauses and points you to real helplines, though the check is automatic and won’t catch everything.

Questions

Is Untangle a good Lasting alternative for couples who fight a lot?

If the problem is the fight itself, yes. Lasting teaches skills through lessons you do at your own pace. Untangle puts Tara, an AI mediator, between you while you talk, each on your own phone, so you both walk away heard. If you’d rather learn calmly first, Lasting is the better pick.

Does Lasting have an AI mediator?

Neither its App Store listing nor Choosing Therapy’s review describes live or AI mediation. Lasting is content you work through together: short sessions and courses.

Is Lasting or Untangle therapy?

Untangle is not therapy and not for emergencies. Lasting calls itself a therapy program and is a Talkspace company, but Choosing Therapy’s review notes it doesn’t give you access to licensed therapists by message, phone or video. For serious trouble, see a licensed therapist.

Do both partners have to pay?

No, for either. One Lasting Premium subscription unlocks the app for two users. With Untangle, your partner joins free from a link, and their seat is always included in the $25 a month.

Can I download Untangle today?

Not yet. Untangle is an iPhone app, and it’s arriving on the App Store soon. It will be 3 days free, then $25 a month for both of you.